The Bach | Week 6 Recap

5:52 PM

I truly believe that this might be the dumbest show on television. Although, I did see an ad for "I Wanna Marry Harry," and actually felt superior to those who watch that. Yes, I'm judging YOU.

This week we're in Venice. I have been to Venice. I don't know how much making out I'd want to do when you are dodging flying pigeons and their flying poop of death. I don't know that I agree with Andi that this is the most romantic city in the world. Beautiful, yes, but again, pigeon poop doesn't inspire romance, in my humble opinion. Then...they proceed to "play" with said pigeons. Gross. #handsanitizeranyone

I just threw up in my mouth a little. And washed my hands again.

Andi.
I had much more respect for her during Pabs' season. I thought she had guts. She finally told this guy off, and we fell in love with her. Now...she seems weak and silly. I realize that she doesn't see everything that we see, but for the love. These guys are so transparent. They are pulling the wool over your eyes, girl. It's just not that difficult to see that. Part of me is convinced that this is acting & not reality. Saying that makes me sound so stupid, but good grief.

Side note: why are these lavish meals prepared and no one ever eats?! I would rather eat than have this painful conversations with these guys. At least my mouth would be occupied so I wouldn't have to make conversation. Andi, good food is going to waste. This is the real tragedy.

Josh.
I mean, really? He's obviously hiding something. And she kept him. Every other guy was able to let it slide, but he freaks about the lie detector test. "I feel like you don't trust me." She doesn't know you. She's known you for 6 weeks, and mostly, only sees you in group settings. Why would she trust you? You could have 6 wives at home, dude. You could have a 3rd nipple Consider yourself lucky, dude. You should have been sent packin'.

Nick.
Way to back peddle. She bought it. This is followed by the most insincere "I'm falling in love with you" I have ever seen. Too bad he wasn't hooked up to the lie detector test when he said that.

Cody.
Oh, man. Watching him yammer on & on about how much she means to him, & how he feels about her...awkward. Pretty crappy that we had to watch that whole scene before she finally cut him off & told him she respects him too much to give him a rose. Painful.

Hey Muscles, did you see her face? Use facial cues as a clue for when to stop professing your love. She looked like she was constipated. These types of faces are social cues telling you that she is not interested.

lololololol

Dylan.
What the heck? He was sick from the lie detector test, and then there was no follow-up? Weird.

Chris.
I will admit that the secret admirer thing was kind of cute. Him joshin' around with the guys about who it could be was hilarious. And kudos to Chris for telling JJ (aka pantsapreneur...WTF!) to calm the heck down.

JJ. 
"I'm getting really sick of being happy for the other guys when they get a rose." Ok. Sorry? It's called being a decent human being, Pantsy. It's making an awkward, irritating situation less awkward & irritating. You acting like a d.b. does not help the situation. And honey, did you really think you were going to get a rose? Nah.

Marcus.
If I have to see your tongue one more time, I'm going to lose my shiitake mushrooms. Disgusting.

Have you ever fart in public? 
I was dying. The tester's face was priceless. He was legitimately annoyed at these guys. Sorry, sir. In 'Merica, farting is hilarious. And when your Italian "fought" sounds like "fart," we're going to get the giggles.

What did you think? Who do you think she will choose? What adjective will Chris Harrison use to describe the final rose ceremony this season? Dramatic? Romantic? Breathtaking? We're running out of those adjectives. I'd love to hear him use something like "...the most sweaty final rose ceremony." Or something like that.

xoxo,
a.

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